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If there’s a better term for a person’s head than ‘gourd’, I have yet to hear it.

1 year ago
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I wonder if anyone will notice that my turquoise backwards hat matches my turquoise t-shirt?

1 year ago
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A blooper reel blooper reel is all the takes where the actors got their lines right, there were no tech snafus, and nobody giggled.

1 year ago
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Today I am not just wearing clothes. Today I am wearing an outfit.

1 year ago
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My breakfast this morning was a spoonful of Nutella. You know. Because of the hurricane.

1 year ago
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Pig bacon is delicious, turkey bacon is healthy, and hedgehog bacon is cruel. It takes ten hedgehogs for just one strip! Spread the word.

1 year ago
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Yes, I have a lot of Art Deco in my life, but I could always use more.

1 year ago
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I was just calling to tell you that my favorite Yeah Yeah Yeah’s song is now ‘Y Control. Yes, that’s right, it was ‘Maps’ before.

1 year ago
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I don’t mean to sound alarmist or anything, but do you think that advertising is sometimes a little less than honest?

1 year ago
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What did the horse say to the hay? Happy Fodder’s Day! Then the horse ate the hay. On Fodder’s Day. Isn’t that messed up?

2 years ago
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Pandora just helped me learn that I like The Thermals but do not like bands that sound like The Thermals.

2 years ago
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All things considered, it is impossible to consider all things.

2 years ago
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Nothing like a hot day to make you realize that over-ear headphones are basically just noisy earmuffs.

2 years ago
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Last summer I started wearing swimsuits as underwear and underwear as swimsuits. Haven’t looked back since.

2 years ago
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Ice cold water is ice.

2 years ago